Defining Coaching Presence

by Seth Sinclair

Coaching presence is a very important tool, perhaps the most important tool, in a successful coach’s arsenal.  The International Coach Federation (ICF) describes presence as the “ability to be fully conscious and create spontaneous relationships with the client, employing a style that is open, flexible, and confident.”

Great coaches all have great presence, but what does that really mean?  I like the brief definition on Mike the Mentor’s blog.  He defines presence as the ability to be with someone in such a way that the person comes to know himself or herself better. A coach who is present in a meeting with a client, whether in person or on the phone, has put aside his or her own problems and issues and is giving the client his or her full attention.

Coaches with presence listen intently and effectively.  They concentrate on the speaker’s words, watch for body language to help them interpret those words, keep their thoughts from wandering by mentally paraphrasing what the speaker is saying, establish and maintain a pattern of eye contact, and ask questions summarizing what they have heard.

They are real and caring, listening to what the client says without forming opinions of their own; are genuine and authentic in their responses and actions; and have a passion for learning about and understanding the ideas and thoughts of others.

They stay grounded during difficult conversations.  A coach with a strong presence will not be knocked off balance when emotional or challenging topics arise during a coaching session.

They want to be doing what they are doing.  They enjoy closely observing the lives of others and helping them see their actions from a different point of view; offering alternative choices for future actions and behaviors; and helping their clients reach their goals, whatever they are.

And they believe in themselves.  They’ve had enough training to know that they have the right tools to take advantage of teaching situations that come up—and that when the moment is right, they will use those tools to best advantage.

When clients work with coaches with great presence, they grow to believe their coach is fully committed to them and their issues.  As a result, they open themselves more fully to the coaching process, to learning more about themselves, and to the possibilities of change.  We wrote in a previous post that the major reason a relationship fails is the absence of trust: great presence is a sure way to build and maintain trust between a coach and a client.

Some people believe presence is an inherited skill, and that it cannot be taught.  I believe otherwise.  Coaches, like anyone else, can learn to become better listeners.  They can learn to focus better.  And they can, and should, be observed by other professional coaches on a regular basis.  These observations should include an evaluation of how “in the moment” a coach is, how confident the coach is, and how effective he or she is in choosing the right strategy when the opportunity arises.

Whether coaching is done face-to-face, on the phone, or even via email, one thing is absolutely clear: for coaches to help clients grow and change, a strong presence is indispensible.